The truth about becoming “that” girl (And why It’s really about you) Momma’s Monday Memo #3
Preface: A Memo Written With Love
Before we dive in, I need you to know:
Everything I write here — the tough love, the encouragement, the grit — is mostly aimed directly at myself. If it pushes you, grows you, or even just makes those wheels start turning, then I’m honored. This space is built with love — messy, fierce, wholehearted love.
This Week’s Chit-Chat: Becoming “That Girl”
We all have a version of “her” in our mind. The woman we daydream about becoming:
- The pilates mom
- The bookworm with the perfect cozy corner
- The calm homesteader
- The fashion icon
- The mulitasker chasing dreams while raising babies
(Quick Pause: Remember, social media is a curated highlight reel. Comparing your behind the scenes to someones trailer is theft — you rob yourself before you even give yourself an opportunity at growth.)
For me?
My “that girl” dreams are full of women who are calm, steady, grounded.
Moms who aren’t buried under five loads of laundry and to-do lists.
Women with follow through.
Women who live boldly, not just endlessly plan for someday.
Reality Check: Growing Out Your Bangs (and Your Life)
Becoming “that girl” is messy.
It’s awkward — like growing out bad bangs.
It’s standing in the uncomfortable, in-between stage where you’re not who you were but not quite who you want to be.
But here’s the thing:
You are still growing.
And that’s what matters.
The Real Truth About Becoming “That Girl”
It’s not about:
- The car you drive
- The amount in your bank account.
- The size of your jeans
- The house you live in
It’s about becoming the most authentic, rooted version of yourself.
Showing up for YOU the way you show up for everyone else.
Honoring your dreams the way you encourage your kids to honor theirs.
Because you freaking matter.
You matter enough to bet on yourself.
You matter enough to lead by example.
You matter enough to be more than the roles you fill — mom, wife, sister, daughter.
You were called to be you.
And that calling deserves your full, brave attention.
Hard Truth: You Are the Problem (and That’s Good News)
Ready for the hardest pill to swallow?
The thing standing between you and your “that girl” life is you.
I know. Ouch.
I’m cringing right alongside you.
Because the truth is, it’s so much easier to blame:
- The schedule
- The kids
- The economy
- The stress
- The bad luck
But waiting for the perfect circumstances is like waiting for a unicorn to Uber you to yoga class.
It’s not coming.
Real Talk: My Favorite Excuses
These used to be my daily mantras (still guilty of them somedays):
- “I don’t have time.”
- “The kid kept me up all night.”
- “Someone else needs me more.”
- “I’m too overwhelmed.”
There will always be something else demanding your attention.
But at some point, you have to decide: Are you going to let life keep happening to you, or are you going to happen to life?
Why It’s Okay to Be Messy
Every choice has a positive and a negative.
There’s no perfect season, no flawless moment.
Growth is messy. Healing is uncomfortable.
Self-love often looks like crying on the couch and getting up anyway.
The goal isn’t to escape discomfort.
It’s to ride it.
You are allowed to change.
Even if you’ve already grown.
You are never trapped in who you used to be or who you currently are.
How to Start: Bitesized, Slow and Steady
Forget the instant gratification ( yes, I know it feels amazing).
Here’s the truth about becoming “that girl”:
- It’s one tiny, unglamorous step a day.
- It’s doing the thing you don’t feel ready for
- It’s choosing growth even when it’s boring, hard and unseen.
Every tiny choice compounds.
Every effort counts.
Even those ones that only last for 5 minutes.
And one day, you’ll wake up and realize you’ve become her — quietly, steadily, without needing to announce it to anyone.
Final Thoughts: Nothing Changes If Nothing Changes
You already know what it feels like to stay the same.
You already know what stuck feels like.
What if you chose something different?
What if today’s messy, brave little step was the start of the next version of yourself?
Get up.
Move.
Grow.
You are so wildly capable, mama.
And the world is waiting for her —
The woman you’re already becoming.
Until next Monday, Momma — keep doing the damn thing, one messy, beautiful moment at a time. And remember, you’re not just getting through it, you’re growing through it. The best is still blooming.
Stay shining ☀️
